You Know Your Cat Is Scheming To Kill You When…


…you catch him spying on you from behind the sofa.


…you wake up in the morning to find him staring at you, unblinking.

Sweet dreams, human. 


…he sends you a clear message by disemboweling the standing floor lamp.




Insult:  1 /ın’sʌlt/  v.t. abuse scornfully; offend self-respect or modesty of.   2 /ın’sʌlt/  n. insulting remark or action.

Ultimate insult:  /’ʌltımǝt ın’sʌlt/  n.  when you pet your sleeping cat, and he wakes up, lifts his head, and cleans the area where your hand touched his fur.

No More Vomiting

It’s been almost a fortnight since Muci’s Weekend of Bloody Vomit, and he seems to be his normal self again. He’s regained his appetite but is still on steroids and will continue to be for a while. He spends his mornings running around the house and scrambling all over the sofa as if it were a magpie-laden tree.

Sigh, the poor sofa.

Oh well. I’d rather have a scratched-up sofa than pools of bloody vomit all over the house.


So, Muci had another bout of vomiting over the past weekend, and last night it was pretty bad – he was vomiting blood.

My sleep was interrupted at various points throughout the night with sounds of him retching, and this morning, armed with a tub of wet lemony Swiffer cloths and a roll of kitchen towels, I went around the house hunting for pools of bloody saliva and mopping them up.

Yet another trip to the vet was in order.

When the time came to put Muci into his carrier, however, I found him hiding in his cat tree:

Muci's safe haven

It was as if he knew danger was imminent, and was very reluctant to come out of his hiding place.

So I had to pull him out of that box, head first, through that small hole.

And as I slowly, but firmly, pulled Muci out through the circular opening, taking care not to injure his shoulders or forelegs, a bizarre thought entered my mind…

I felt like a midwife.


…is the feeling you get when your cat walks all over your freshly mopped floor.

Murderous intent…

…is what’s bubbling inside you when your cat stops, turns around, and looks at you as if to say, “What?”

A memento…

…is the long line of paw prints you see on the floor when the sun shines into your house.

A vicious cycle…

…is when all this happens again next week, and every week.